Second Cousin Once Removed (and Twice Disowned) Philbert “Smilin’ Phil” Hardmeat wasn’t the most fun relative to be around, but he’s worth mentioning all the same.
Second Cousin, Once Removed Philbert “Smilin’ Phil” Hardmeat wasn’t the jolliest guy. This had to do with his unfortunate constipation issues. Even worse, we discovered these issues (and his shrieking night terrors, we believe) were caused by a parasitic twin who parked himself just behind Philbert’s duodenum.
So, what I’m trying to say is don’t forget to get a colonoscopy as you get older. Don’t be a “Smilin’ Phil”, ok?